Finally...

So Fall 2010 semester is officially over!! Woo hoo!! It really hasn't kicked in yet, but am looking forward to some down time. I told me friend today that these upcoming weeks, I can feel like doing nothing and not feel sorry about it. I do want to try and get a head start for the next semester classes, but that can wait a while.

Regarding training, I've been under the weather. Had a bad stomach virus again, and am still trying to recover from it. I've been lifting weights, but not much else, because I haven't felt up for anything. Been tired alot of all the late night study sessions, but tonight I can look forward to a good nights rest.

Now that school is over for a few weeks, I can just focus on work and makin' some money. I'm not going home until December 23, but for those 2 weeks of being in Dallas, I'm going to soak it all up!!

Hit a Road Block...

Training has been going very well. Slow at times from work and school, but I continue to trot along. This past week, I've been feeling somewhat down...just tired! Well it all caught up to me on Tuesday morning, I didn't go to class because my throat was hurting so bad. Went to the doc on Wednesday and she just told me to take it easy for the next few days. Yesterday, it hit me hard..stomach flu and the regular flu all at once. A double whammy! But I'm feeling somewhat better today; I was able to get out of bed and go lay on the couch (huge progress) and I'm not coughing as much.

I'm thinking though it was my body's way of telling me to slow it down just a bit. Which I will, because I hate to feel the way I do.

More posts to come..

And so it begins...

"For nothing is impossible with God." ~ Luke 1:37

So I must say that I'm so blessed with the people God has placed in my life. I received my first check in the mail yesterday, for my fundraising efforts for the half-ironman. A special thanks goes out to Melissa, for being so generous.

So training has been coming along quite well. I have been keeping a nutrition log about what I eat throughout the day, and I can honestly say that I don't eat as bad as I think. Yes, on occasion like yesterday, I did throw in the powdered donuts, but mainly I've been doing pretty good. With training though, I've been doing baseline work, meaning I've been keeping my heart rate (HR) within special limits; 120-125. I can tell a difference on the bike, because I was able to keep a steady pace of 16-17mph and was able to do about 13 miles in 45 minutes, which is a huge improvement for me! Praise Jesus for this.

I'm taking a strength training class for school, and this should help me build up the muscles that are lacking. I can tell a difference in my legs for sure, more toned! :)

Keep looking back for more updates! God Bless!!

Here we go yet again...

So, I've decided that I'm going to start training again for another triathlon; a half-ironman to be exact. Memorial Hermann Ironman 70.3 Texas on April 11, 2011! Cy is going to be my coach, and I've got him at no charge. I'm going to keep updating on here, for anyone that cares. :)

Going in All Directions

"The Lord rewards every man for his righteousness and faithfulness." 1 Samuel 26:23

I'm starting to be doubtful again with him. I've been giving him some days to think or just get his thoughts together before I get in touch with him. Last week, I had texted him just to see whats up and I never got a reply back. About a week and a half later, I received a phone call, but I was in class, so no answer there. I called him back yesterday, and left a message. But yet today at 8:15pm, still no phone call.

Is it supposed to be so hard on me emotionally and mentally? Can he not be man enough to not lead me on and just be upfront with me about everything. I have so many feelings for him and I constantly feel like I'm getting dropped but yet I keep forgiving him and letting him back into my life. Why do I let this happen so much? Let myself put my feelings out in the open and there's not a response back. Oh and if there is a response, its on his time, like weeks behind of when all this happens. Why Lord? Why is all this happening? Are you allowing this? Are you trying to teach me a lesson?

Lord, I'm so lost. I don't know which direction to go into. I feel like I'm in this all alone. Please come rescue me and my feelings. Allow me to see straight. Take all these emotions out and allow me to see and feel your mercy! Lord, I need you. Take my mind off him and allow it to go to useful things. You WILL will happen. Everything is going to work out the way you allow it to happen. You've got this messy situation. Please protect my heart and feelings if this isn't going to work out.

I've given this to you!

Searching

"The lamp of the Lord searches the spirit of a man; it searches out his inmost being." Proverbs 20:27

Is God ever lost? Does he wonder what's hidden that he cannot see? No, of course not. God's vision is better than perfect. He sees inside us, past us and ahead of us. Our God is searching; his vision penetrates us.

Unlike God, we are mistresses of self-deception. Often our true motives mystify us. The good news is that God is searching out our inner beings. He is not distracted by our layers of meaning, motives or excuses. His eyes penetrate us-he knows us far better than we do. If your searching for answers, stop trying to figure things out on your own; ask God to search your heart.

Grace and Love

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

Without even realizing it, many of us are trying to win God's favor. This world has reinforced for us time and time again that we have to do something in order to be loved. So we try to "be a good girl" and do things that will make God happier with us-working tirelessly to try to prove that we're worthy of him.

But the fact is that we're not worthy of him and will never be. The gospel turns this world's logic on its head. The Good News of Jesus Christ is that he offers free, undeserved, unconditional, eternal love and grace to any sin-stained, hopeless, ragamuffin person who turns to him. Because of that, you can...

Revel in his Grace. This is the greatest gift in the universe; enjoy it. Live like you're free because you are (see Ephesians 2:4-5).

Relax and rest in the only unconditional love available. Human love always has limits. God's love has NO limits. Stop trying to earn or win his love. Discard that performance-based faith. Let go and fall back into his safe and loving arms. You are accepted and deeply loved.

Remember that God's love for you has nothing, absolutely nothing, to do with you. It's not because of your good behavior that he saved you (see Romans 5:6-8). He saved you because of him, because he loved you, not because of you or something you did to earn it. His very personal love for you depends on him, not you-and he never changes.

Dating

"Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." ~Song of Songs 3:5

Within each of us is a desire to be known and loved. Maybe that's why we take to heart the words of Genesis 2:18, "It's not good...to be alone." Being alone can be very hard, and it's natural to want a relationship so we have companionship. The danger comes when our desire to escape being alone turns into an expectation or agenda. You can be easily disappointed if God doesn't seem to follow your plans.

The world may tell you that you're somehow incomplete if you're single, especially if you're not in a romantic relationship at all. God tells you you're complete if you have HIM. You may know that intellectually, but how do you truly accept that and live as if you're whole, regardless of whether or not you're in a relationship?

1) Remember that not all relationships are blissful-and some are downright painful. Singleness isn't just an escape route from a bad relationship or a waiting period between relationships. As many women would attest, it's better to be single than to be in a bad relationship.
2) Consider some of the benefits of being single. Read 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 and ask God to show you what's good about your station in life.
3) As the old saying goes, "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence." Explore whats good about your side of the fence. Contentment is the way to start exploring your territory. As Paul says, "I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether leiving in plenty or in want (Phillipians 4:12). He might have added "whether single or married!"
4) Remind yourself of the truth about God's love for you. As Psalm 84:11 says, "No good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless." In other words, if you're his child, he wont withhold anything from you that you need.
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Women spend alot of time, energy and money trying to make a relationship happen. We agonize over the perfect outfit that will get his attention. We spend hours talking with our girlfriends, analyzing his every word and action and spinning ideas for how to keep the relationship going. We flirt, tease, and manipulate in order to catch his interest. We're afraid we might miss him if we're not paying attention. Are we going about this all wrong? God tells us to quit trying so hard and wait for God to stir the waters of love at the right time and in the right place.

Devotion

"I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead." ~Philippians 3:10

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...It is hard enough for a single woman to keep her focus where it should be without friends making insensitive comments (about not being married). How much better it would be for the single woman if she were encouraged to pursue her undistracted devotion to the Lord Jesus Christ, instead of being made feel like she does not quite measure up...

Much too often people view a single woman as though she should be pitied rather than envied. Nothing could be further from the truth. A christian woman has the advantage of being able to develop her love relationship with Christ without the distraction that a husband or family inherently bring to one's heart.

This has been God's plan from the beginning. He tenderly created woman to love Him and to experience the blessedness of fellowship with Him. In those first days, Eve communed with God in indescribable fellowship and oneness. When God came to walk in the cool of the day, there was no fear; only love. Eve had only positive feelings about God. She loved Him and knew He loved her. She enjoyed Him and devoted herself totally to His pleasure.

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As a single, you have a wonderful opportunity to use your time to maximize your fellowship with God. When you love someone, you give them your heart, the center of your being. God asks for no less. He desires a totally devoted heart. Deuteronomy 6:5 says that you are to love Him with all your heart (deepest devotion), your soul (what you think and what you feel), and your might ( your strength and energy).

Many women today are devoted, all right! They have devoted themselves to developing a love relationship, but not with the Lord. They erroneously seek for love in sensations and promises. The world's vision of love is something they want to "fall into." Meanwhile, "true love" escapes them. True love can only be found in undistracted devotion to Jesus Christ.

God has given you a precious privileged time. Don't waste a day of it. You will never have it again. These days can be treasure-finding days in your Kingly Father's chambers. As you linger at the window ledge searching for a glimmer of your knight's shining armor, don't miss the jewels your Father has for you to adorn yourself. Will you grow cold and bitter at the window sill, or will you hold your royal head high, glowing in your Father's love and attention. The choice remains with you, dear princess. Your Father will not force you to turn from the window, but He longs to fellowship with you. Come into His chambers, delight in His Presence. May you be filled in Him.

I'm All Around You

I am all around you, hovering over you even as you seek My Face. I am nearer than you dare believe, closer than the air your breathe. If My children could only recognize My Presence, they would never feel lonely again. I know every thought before you think it, every word before you speak it. My presence impinges on your innermost being. Can you see the absurdity of trying to hide anything from Me? You can easily decieve other people, and even yourself; but I read you like an open, large-print book.

Deep within themselves, most people have some awareness of My imminent Presence. Many people run from Me and vehemently deny My existence, because My closeness terrifies them. By My own children have nothing to hear, for I have cleansed them by My blood and clothed them in My righteousness. Be blessed by My intimate nearness. Since I live in you, let Me also live through you, shining My Light into the darkness.

Psalm 139:1-4; Ephesians 2:13; 2 Corinthians 5:21

Disappointed

I'm trying to stay strong with the troubles that are coming in my life. I've continuously pray about it and have left it in God's hands for him to do what's best. I can only do so much, as God will always do what's right in his timeline. My feelings have been hurt because the person that can always turn my day around, must be going through something as well. I've tried getting into contact with this person, but for the past week, no returned phone calls or returned text messages. It takes less than a minute to make a phone call and about 5 seconds to send a text message, so what's the deal? I thought our relationship was much better than that, we had moved past this childish stuff right?

I talked with my parents today about everything going on. Tears were shed, but to me, sometimes I wonder if he deserves my tears. My dad said to not shut the door myself, but let this person do it. I have to be a friend in this situation with whatever this person is struggling with or has doubts about. They have to know that I'm not going anywhere and that if they just start talking, I'm a good and non-judgemental listener. I ask that if you read this, please just be upfront with me. You have been good about that so far. I can't take it anymore with this silence.

This coming weekend, this person has already said they would go to an important event as well as pick me and bring me back to the airport. I still want to continue getting to know you, and you can only push me away if you tell me straight up. I've been praying for you so that God will work in your heart to turn to him with whatever is going on. He has your best interest in mind, and if this is to not work out, then he will get both of us through it. He loves us both!

I care for you and that's not going to change.

Waiting Periods

"But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up on wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint." ~Isaiah 40:31

...Wherever you are, whatever your circumstances may be...be assured that God has not lost your address or your file. He knows exactly where you are and what you need...

You make the most important decision in life, giving your life to Jesus Christ, "by faith." The second most important decision concerns your life-mate. This decision also demands the element of faith. Waiting for one's life-mate and then saying "I do" to him demands secure faith, like Ruth's faith in the God of Israel.

...Your faith during the "waiting period" pleases God.

Don't fear or resent the waiting periods in your life. These are the very gardens where the seeds of faith blossom...

This intruding anxiety about your lack of a life-mate is not reality, but rather a weakness that the Greater Reality is capable of handling. Just go to Jesus as soon as the intruder arrives. Such a practice will only enhance your life as a lady of faith. Many single women have not recognized that the trying, frustrating waiting period is the perfect classroom for the lady of faith. Don't skip class! Embrace those dateless nights and, by faith, rest in His faithfulness.

Lady in Waiting

is not about finding the right man,

but becoming the right woman.

The Lady in Waiting

recklessly abandons herself

to the Lordship of Christ,

diligently uses her single days,

trusts God with unwavering faith,

demonstrates virtue in daily life,

loves God with undistracted devotion,

stands for physical and emotional purity,

lives in security,

responds to life in contentment,

makes choices based on her convictions,

and waits patiently for God to meet her needs.

~ Jackie Kendall and Debby Jones

The Living God

"How lovely is your dwelling place, O Lord Almighty! My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the Lord; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God. Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young-a place near your altar, O Lord Almighty, my King and my God. Blessed are those who dwell in your house; they are ever praising you." ~Psalm 84: 1-4

This beautiful psalm echoes with the deep longing of a spiritual pilgrim whose soul craved to be in God's courts. The psalmist's journey was not to reach a place but to meet a person. His whole body and heart longed for the living God.

On your pilgrimage through life, don't settle for anything less than the living God himself. You will be tempted to turn aside to lesser things, distractions, false panaceas or even diluted theologies of God. But what your body, heart and soul long for is one thing, which cannot be substituted or replaced, the living God himself.

"But in the account of the bush, even Moses showed that the dead rise, for he calls the Lord, the God of Abraham, and the God of Issac, and the God of Jacob. He is not the God of the dead, but of the living, for to him all are alive." ~Luke 20:37-38

Prayer

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable thing you do not know." ~Jeremiah 33:3

Great and unsearchable things-that's what God promised to tell Jeremiah. When we call to God, he also tells us great and unsearchable things. Like what? you may wonder. Like the depth of love that would motivate him to send his Son to die in your place. Like the unending supply of his mercy and grace available to you today. Like what he's doing in this world and how he wants to use you in his plan. For many of us, the problem is that we think prayer is an exercise in talking. But to hear great and unsearchable things, we must also be listening.

Content to Be Me

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." ~Psalm 139:13-16

I am convinced that a woman who struggles with her identity and purpose is a woman who has abdicated control of who she is becoming. Don't forget: God is painting a picture on the canvas of our lives. Our bodies are merely the frame. God intends to paint a beautiful picture-a picture to others of our character and unique expression of Christ's life-and place it in this frame. But he can't create this work of art without our cooperation. It needs to be a lifelong joint project between God and us. If you choose to criticize the frame or resist God's brushstrokes, you will not find contentment. It will elude you. If you focus on God's vision that integrates the picture with the frame, and the development of His message through you, you can say, "I am content to be me."

Will you take the paintbrush in your hand and kneel before your master or try and paint your own strokes?

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"I would rather be what God chose to make me than the most glorius creature that I could think of; for to have been thought about, born in God's though, and then made by God, is the dearest, grandest, and most precious thing in all thinking." ~George MacDonald

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works,which God prepared in advance for us to do." ~Ephesians 2:10

Trust Me in all Your Thoughts

I know that some thoughts are unconscious or semiconscious, and I do not hold you responsible for those. But you can direct conscious thoughts much more than you may realize. Practice thinking in certain ways-trusting Me, thanking Me-and those thoughts become more natural. Reject negative or sinful thoughts as soon as you become aware of them. Don't try to hide them from Me; confess them and leave them with Me. Go on your way lightheartedly. This method of controlling your thoughts will keep your mind in My Presence and your feet on the path of peace.

~ God

Long Day

"Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life." ~Matt 25:46

I have not forgotten to write in this. I went home for the 4th of July weekend to visit with family and friends. As always, it was great. I left this morning at 8am to give myself enough time to make it back down here to CC for my class at 5pm. Took me 7.5 hours because of the massive amounts of traffic.

As I was driving down Ocean Dr. you can definately tell that there was some crazy weather recently. The water is no longer blue green, more like brown! :( Also, as I drove into CC, an electronic sign on the highway said "Storm forming, Fill gas tanks." I'm pretty excited, but there is a chance it could miss us as always!

Its great to be home! Next thing on my agenda is to figure out where I'm moving, which is in about 3 weeks. Praying for some answers.

Praise Be to God!

The Start of Something New

" The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them." ~Psalm 145:18-19

Melina talked me into starting a blog for myself. This should be a good experience and hopefully I can stay up with the posts. I can be very determined at first and then slowly fade away, but I'm going to try and not let that happen. I've decided to start every post off with a bible verse. Just like we should start our day off with God's word; just continuing that to here.

Praise God in all that we do!